Pity Party––Underrated??

My Elphaba/Wicked Witch Side*
My Pollyanna Side
Skeeter has turned out to be a good listener(listens to whatever I say) and a good party guest (goes wherever I say).
I once had a friend tell me how people who were always positive in the face of adversity pissed her off.  I completely agree.  It helps me to stay mostly positive by having the occasional pity party.   I aim to balance my "Pollyanna" side with my "Elphaba/Wicked Witch" side.

Some people believe any negativity is to be avoided, or a downward, irreversible spiral into depression will follow.  Maybe, but like crying, it's more energy–sparing for me to welcome some self–pity and wallow away.  I often feel better, usually gain some insight, and can then move on.  "Pity–party" may be descriptive, but I have a better time if Skeeter and I are the only guests.  She never says a word about my splotchy face, swollen eyes, and snotty nose.  So don't hold your breath for an invitation–it's not coming.

This is my favorite phone screensaver.  Not that 80% of people are happy you have problems...just glad they're not having them.  I'd amend the screensaver to "Don’t tell your problems to EVERYone...", but I think it's important when you're in the pit, to have someone to talk to, who can watch caringly from the edge without climbing down to join you.  I may want an ear, but rarely company.  Neither do I care whose pit is deeper.  I do realize I'm not a recently widowed woman with seven children to feed, no safe water, living in a tent in the winter, on the border with Syria.  Having Ataxia has taught me that there is always someone with a greater or lesser loss, and yet, even knowing that doesn't help.

You know the saying, “I cried because I had no shoes until I saw a man with no feet”?  Well, I’d still cry about not having shoes.


*Elphaba is a fictional character in Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire, as well as in the Broadway adaptation, Wicked. In the original L. Frank Baum book The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, the Wicked Witch of the West is unnamed and little is explained about her life. Elphaba is modeled after the Witch portrayed by Margaret Hamilton in the classic 1939 film The Wizard of Oz: Green-skinned, clad entirely in black, and wearing a tall peaked hat. Maguire formulated the name "Elphaba" out of L. Frank Baum's name, taking the phonetic pronunciation of his initials: hence, L.F.B became El-pha-ba.

Comments

  1. MichelleDennisMarch 11, 2012 at 2:06 PM

    Well said! Wallow away. People will understand and give you space for it; at least the self-secure ones. There's a lot of learning and processing that happens in the disguise of a good wallow.

    ReplyDelete

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