Ahem

So unattractive

Ah, the dreaded cough.  Aside from the difficulty in swallowing that may occur with Ataxia, many unaffected people also fear the hacking that comes with advanced age.  I was surprised to discover I wasn't alone in wanting to avoid any undesirable noise emanating from my throat. Like falling, it tends to elicit attention, even when it's just a "swallowing down the wrong pipe" event.  Of course, it usually happens in public or the middle of the night–oy.  I just don't want a "cough" to be heard as a "hack".  I'm only in my sixties!

The progression of the dreaded cough starts with a little tickle in the back of my throat.  I give a discreet, throat–clearing "ahem" with the hope that it will dissipate quickly.  Then a single, but real, cough (maybe two).  "Please, please–now go away." Finally, it grows into a full-fledged coughing session and, by then, I have surrendered. To hell with it. Coughing, absent any airway obstruction, is a bit like sneezing or crying.  I've learned the urge isn't going away and giving into it takes less time and effort than to resist.

So how does Skeeter fit in? (This is not contrived)  As an inanimate object, she has no reaction if I cough on a scoot.  I'm not referring to life–threatening choking, but that's rare and usually indicated by wheezing and blue lips.  The good news is I could cough my brains out, slobber, even pass gas on Skeeter and she doesn't panic, offer to help–nothing.  The bad news is she doesn't offer to help–nothing.

I remember years ago, a friend had an episode of "wrong pipe" coughing at a large communal dining table.  Everyone stopped talking, looked his way, and were ready to go into "Heimlich Maneuver" mode.  Considering that he didn't need that, we could have hurt him in a misguided rescue zeal.  Fortunately, there was one cool head in the room–his wife.  I can still see her sitting next to him, not visibly alarmed, not even looking in his direction.  "Breathe through your nose...", she repeated calmly, quietly, and slowly. His color remained healthy, the coughing spell passed quickly–at least for me–and dinner went on.  "Wow!" I thought, "That was so cool.  I want to be that unobtrusively helpful next time."

It's not what you think

The lesson: Color good?  No wheezing?  Breathe through your nose.  It'll pass.