A Week With the Girls

Could we spend a week with our two granddaughters while our son and daughter-in-law were in Europe? Sure!  Wait a minute...I knew we wanted to and had always been caring parents, but it had been over 23 years since being caregiving parents with (gulp) responsibility.  Sarah and Kyle had lived with us for eight months, but their parents were always present and in charge. The Tenison family was beginning the move to their new home, so it was a good time to be out of the house.  Now, with my ataxia, I couldn't be an equitable partner to Earl.  While he wouldn't have to take care of me, he would definitely be called on to do more than his share.  Still, we were adults, adored our grandchildren, and were up for this.

Jason and Elizabeth set the caregiving bar low for us.  Instructions: Feed Zoe and Lexi, take them to school, keep them alive.  We were certainly up to basic 'goldfish' care rules, could even do a bit better than that, so we enthusiastically said yes! and began planning.

Jason & Elizabeth

Elizabeth, our daughter-in-law, loves lists (girl after my own heart).  This week called for precise instructions, and she carried it to a whole different level.  We had an organized, well thought-out binder of lists and guidelines.  Suggested school lunch menus were taped to the refrigerator for good measure and Earl, grateful not to be required to make a choice, followed it faithfully.

I had other concerns.  What was the weekly routine?  Who would do their hair?  Could we respond to a medical emergency?  The fact that we had raised two children, cared for two dogs, had medical backgrounds and a son-in-law who had been an ER physician for eight years, completely escaped me for the moment.  Anxiety and temporary panic caused my brains to fall out, but I recovered.  Confident that we had secret weapons in our resourceful and independent granddaughters, we turned our attention to the fun activities we could squeeze into seven days and a school schedule.

Pedicures and manicures

Lexi & Porter, Pooh's party

The craft project was preparing a 'Welcome Home' banner for Jason and Elizabeth's return.The girls did their own hair, dressing, and bathing.  In fact, Zoe (9) painted finger nails (I made appointments to get pedicures), dispensed vitamins and told us where everything belonged  She planned, organized and invited Earl and me to Winnie the Pooh's birthday party.  Ever mindful of little sister, Lexi (6), Zoe assigned her party details and seating.  Zoe got up the first weekend morning to make us breakfast, but Grandpa did have to tell her that 5:30 was a little early.  We've always known Zoe loves to plan things and Lexi observes and comments on things, but it was good to be reminded of the value of a child's inherent directness and honesty.  We managed to beat the crowds and get in a trip to the zoo.  Lexi was a baby when I first 'scooted' her around.  Now she was a six year old who was tired of walking and wanted a ride.

The zoo

So, were they well–behaved, companionable, attentive, cooperative?  No crying or drama? Come on!  Zoe and Lexi were children.  The parental units were out of town, and the grandparent units weren't known for saying 'no' providing physical injury wasn't involved. Earl and I may have been lax, but we weren't stupid. When in doubt, we could always refer to the rule list.

Jumping, running, laid out

Believe it or not, one of the biggest reservations was Porter, the family 80 lb. golden retriever.  At a bit less than two years, he was still a puppy, loved to run and jump.  Of greater concern was the combination of the dog and me.  Porter slept in our bedroom (the master), and preferred to stretch out in the path between my side and the bathroom.  Jason, concerned for my survival, had told me to 'ram him with the walker if necessary'. Two things: First, I probably wouldn't have the heart for that and secondly, since his fur is nearly the color of the carpet, I wouldn't be able to distinguish him from the floor at night.  A disaster in the making, to be sure... But Porter (smart dog) was quick to move whenever he heard the walker approaching.  By the end of the week, we were BFFs and he didn't seem angry with me.


The lessons:  There's a reason people have children while they're young.  Children love to be purposefully helpful and can make a game out of anything.  We all had a good time, the girls survived, but they missed Mommy and Daddy.