Maintaining Contact


One of the challenging things about having four different grandchildren at different ages and interests is having four different grandchildren at different ages and interests.  It was easier when they were younger.  Although evenly spaced by two or three years, their interests seemed more similar and predictable.  Now—not so much.

Grandparenting little ones
I remember my mom being a terrific, engaged grandmother to our children when they were very young.  But as Heidi and Jason began to become individual people with their own ideas about what was fun, she didn't know what in the hell to do.  Being outlandish by nature, Ada redeemed herself as they got older, reclaiming her craziness and reconnected with her 'grown' grandchildren.  Their memories of her focus on the goofy Grandma.  My father, Lanny, was happy being Santa (the helper) to them.  Life lesson...
It's hard enough as a grandparent to stay connected with children as they mature.*  But having limited mobility adds another level of complication to the mix.  However, the kids don't seem to give any indication, that they care that I move or speak differently when I show up.

I'm glad to have a mobile partner in Earl, a very engaged grandfather.  He can run with the oldest granddaughter, shoot hoops with her brother, cycle and hike with the other set of grandchildren.  Rarely going to outdoor games and meets because of terrain and weather, I usually prioritize the convenience and ease of access for indoor events.  Occasionally, I experience my usual wistful envy, but for the most part, I'm happy to rely on Earl to provide the family representation and over–rely on the other grandparents' attendance.  Michael's Mom and Dad rarely miss an event if they're in town. 

The connecting value of a game
A friend of mine entices her grandchildren to join in for family game nights.  You might be rolling your eyes, thinking nothing could match the entertainment value of TV, tablets, and smartphones. We had learned kids can be entertained by many things during a family vacation in 2014** .  But, when we cracked out new (to us) games in Maui this year, I think everyone was surprised by the fun and the laughing from three generations.  The grandchildren actually preferred playing games to watching TV and were OK with assuming game jobs (picking up and moving tokens) that I couldn't do expeditiously.  I found myself wishing we had played more games when Heidi and Jason were growing up.  At that time, reading a book or mindlessly watching TV seemed more appealing to me.  Oh well, live and learn.

Hold still, Grandma
Another friend gave a facepainting kit to Zoe, who took on the challenge of turning my face into a canvas. She had an artistic vision and steady hands.  I had a face and no steadiness was required.  Lexi, the youngest grandchild, likes to see how much maneuvering is needed for wheelchair races.  She had the speed and spatial perspective to avoid corners.  I had a wheelchair and no independent mobility was required.

It wouldn't be me if I didn't give a nod to the benefits of technology.***  Our first question to ourselves:  Does it enhance connection or increase the distance between people?  Truth be told, we've done both.  Since it's illegal to put chips in humans, current smartphones do make it easier to monitor children's locations.  As Heidi and Michael approach parenting teenagers, we've seen them change the online communication rules. We started to tease Heidi about texting her daughter who was in the same house, until she reminded us that her daughter may be behind a closed door someday.  "I want her to know she doesn't have to look at me to 'talk'."  Another life lesson...
As parents to younger children, Elizabeth and Jason stay vigilant by allowing limited use of age–appropriate technology and privacy, and liberal use of parental controls.  Jason travels for work and uses FaceTime/Skype to stay connected to home. 

The Lesson: Despite the ataxia and progression of time, there is usually some way to stay connected with four very different grandchildren.  I need to stay in the uh–game.


*Previous post: Grandma, why do you walk funny?
**Previous post: Family Vacation 2014—Deviceless!
***Previous post: Hi, I'm Tammy and I'm a Tech Gadget Addict

Comments

  1. You are SO fun- I love the zing you put into things ⭐️

    ReplyDelete

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