Sliding Into Retirement

The doc and the doll

"Are you still working?"  Earl hears that from colleagues on a regular basis.  His answer is "Yes, three days a week.  Starting February 1, 2015,  I'll move to two days a week." April 1, 2015, he's officially retiring—sort of.  He may occasionally assist on cases, but he's done being the primary surgeon in the operating room.  April 1 is a bit later than his original date of June 2014, but no one believed that anyway*.  A year ago, retirement seemed premature. But it sounds more and more appealing to him as time goes by.
One of his co–workers, who loves Halloween, created an 'Earl' doll for the occasion.  It was complete with surgical hat, prominent forehead, vascular loops, lab coat, big heart, and big nose on a lean frame.  That's my guy.

I'm a bit apprehensive, but mostly admiring of Earl's gradual transition toward retirement*.   Ending a rewarding career must seem scary initially, but he has so many irons in the fire, there is no shortage of activities to occupy his time.  The job, while lucrative, was already interfering with his fun.  Still under an employer sponsored health plan, he took care of his preventive healthcare and is OK for another 20,000 miles. Like a good Schuman male, he is now tattooed (just kidding) with a 'best used by date'. With our finances more or less in order, he is ready to hang it up.

I'm looking forward to more of Earl's time.  We both realize there will be an adjustment phase and we'd like to navigate it carefully without killing each other.  I get the "Are you ready?" question as much as he does.  The truth is, as my ataxia progresses, my needs will increase.  Inherited ataxia does progress (duh).  We just don't know how it's going to look.** In the meantime, 'have device, will travel'. In addition to periodic caregiver, he is my transportation, yoga partner, trainer, cook, and grocery shopper.  We have future travel plans (his, mine & ours) and that takes extra effort too.  Deciding when, where, how long to go, how best to get there, and what kind of access is available, has to be considered whether it's just for lunch or a month–long road trip. 

So how will Earl fill his time?  Let me count the ways.

More Time for Family

Everyone knows how important our village is to us, particularly the grandchildren.  Earl wants to spend more time with them while they still allow it.  In five years, the youngest will be preteen, the oldest will be driving.  All four grandchildren will no doubt be eye–rolling.  We've vowed to be prepared for that time without getting our noses out of joint.  A mobility–impaired grandmother and aging grandparents aren't always welcome at the party.  Right now, they think Earl's great, like spending time with him, and that will add to his day.

More Time for Athletics

Some people look forward to more leisure in their retirement.  Earl is looking for more activity—go figure.  More cycling, running, hiking, backpacking.  Fortunately, I was never his only playmate.  I'm content to say "Bye-bye dear, have fun..."as he heads out.  Then I track him with the Find My Friends app (marital cyber stalking) on my phone.  Family, friends and grandchildren are his athletic companions these days.

More Time for Family in Maui

More Time for Friends in Maui

We are part of a limited partnership that gives us 16 weeks a year in Maui.  Not only is it warm and lovely there, it's been an idyllic place to spend time with family and friends.  Our second home is peaceful and casual, but varied (geologically and recreationally) in its offerings.  There is a lot for guests to see and do.  Although we tend to go in two week blocks, Earl's retirement may allow for a longer stay.

Earl & Theresa; Earl & Heidi; Earl & Sarah

When he was a boy, Earl 's mother got him started on piano lessons and cracked the piano whip when he needed to practice.  He stopped to head off to college.  He was good, but no concert pianist.  Another career track seemed to be in order.  We've had his old parlor grand piano, bought second hand by his parents, Theresa and George, most of our married life.  At age 68, Earl resumed music lessons with Sarah–something they could enjoy together.  When her schedule got too hectic, he continued.  Ironically, he is taking lessons from the same teacher Heidi and Jason had as children.  He had played periodically with them when they were little and has always loved music.  But when he returned to the piano seriously, it came back fairly quickly–sort of like, uh, riding a bicycle...  Good thing Earl is internally motivated to practice—his mother is no longer around.

Never met a dahlia I didn't like

Earlier in our marriage, Earl and I shared a reputation for having black thumbs and not being able to nurture plants.  He went and spoiled things by taking an interest in dahlias and having some success.  It developed into a friendly competition (who can grow the most) between our friend, the dahlia queen; our daughter-in-law, the dahlia princess, and Earl, the dahlia prince.  I'm satisfied to be the court arranger and take the floral bounty from whoever***.  The three of them share dahlia catalogs, growing and wintering tips.  To use the word 'hobby' doesn't do justice to this 'sideline' (too casual)...'obsession' (too snarky)... 'skill' (too envious).  I'm going with endeavor and calling it good.

The Lesson:  New chapter: Retirement; too many things to do.  No time for a job.

*Previous post: Honey, I'm home
**Previous post: One Day at a Time
***Previous post: A Creative Outlet