Sharing the holidays

As I approached the first post-retirement Christmas, I vowed not to go into it channeling last year's Holiday Dictator.* It's not as if I usually did everything and Earl did nothing. It's just that I had never shared in the decision-making. I'm not a "My Way or the Highway" kind of person.  But during Christmas, I have to admit to being a "My Way is the Best Way" kind of person. 

Outdoor Décor
Earl started by getting the Christmas ornaments out of the attic.  That area used to be somewhat organized. Then we remodeled our house and the Tenison family moved in while their house was being built.**  The attic was where we threw everything that didn't have a home and now it was a death trap.  Fortunately, Earl (new to the 'Elf Club'), only bumped his head a couple of times and managed not to kill himself while extricating the holiday paraphernalia***.  He moved on to hang the big ornaments all along the driveway and put up the outdoor lights with the help of our neighbors. We always have the "ladder" argument.  I say he can do anything that doesn't require getting on a ladder.  He waits until my back is turned, and then gets on a ladder.

Indoor Décor
Having disabilities and being in a wheelchair keeps me from participating in some things.  But having the time, inclination and cognition, I can still plan.  I just had to be nicer.  Earl and I bought and picked out the large tree fairly efficiently.  As in previous years, I booked our niece and nephew for the tree lights, asked my friend(nicely) to decorate the house again, and asked our granddaughter Zoe (cheerfully) to put ornaments on the reachable parts of the tree.  I quietly sat and enjoyed others doing the work of the transformation.



Themed table maintenance
"Table maintenance" is a term I picked up from a friend whose husband was the family cook. Setting the table and lighting candles (really?) became her job.  Since Earl does most of the shopping and cooking, table maintenance is now my job.  For celebratory events, I take the responsibility way too seriously, thinking up various themes.  Like flower arranging, it's another outlet.  However, if someone said, "get a life" or rolled their eyes, I couldn't blame them.  I'm not a fan of having a kids' table in a different room for special dinners, but the grandchildren are now at the age where that is their preference.  This year, the adults sit at the Asian–themed table and the children at the Harry Potter–themed table.

Jingle Bells Run
One of the traditions I do miss taking part in is our annual 'Jingle Bells Run', a run/walk through the Portland downtown hotel's Christmas decorations.  We started it with our running friends 20 years ago and, like many running activities, is more walking than running.  Skeeter and I have gone when the weather is good, but if rain threatens, it's no fun for me. Skeeter and I are happy to stay dry at home.  Nowadays, granddaughter Sarah (age 12) can join Earl on the jaunt. 

The Lesson:  An 'Over the Top Holiday Lover' with no balance, needs an 'Over the Top Holiday Village'.



 *Previous post: The Holiday Dictator
**Previous post: The Multi–Generational Household
 ***Previous post: The Holiday Elves

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